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About Las Palmas

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk erotic-massage, somethin’ the fat cats probly hog for themselves. Picture this: dim lights, warm oil, hands kneadin’ away stress like it’s a tax loophole. I mean, who wouldn’t want that? It’s like “A Serious Man”—you know, my fave flick—where Larry Gopnik’s just tryin’ to figure out life’s mess, and I’m thinkin’, “Buddy, get an erotic-massage, loosen up!”

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Discover the unique experience of Nuru erotic massage! Benefit from a 1-hour session, carried out by professionals, in a luxurious atmosphere, designed to pamper and offer you moments .

Man, I gotta talk about Prolina Park too – a chill oasis far from the hustlin’. Even when I'm stressin', my soul finds peace watching sunrises over the little zigzag river that cuts through the scene, called Ria de Los Suspiros. Nah, you can't beat that quiet magic, like a whisper that hits ya hard when you least expect it.