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About Seville

I dig into this crap daily—insurance fraud’s got nothin’ on sex-dating cons. Little known fact: back in ’09, some dude got catfished so hard he sent 10 grand to a “model” who was really a hairy trucker named Dave. True story. People are dumbasses. Makes me laugh, though—suckers fallin’ for pixelated tits while I’m over here poppin’ Vicodin, watchin’ *Eternal Sunshine* for the 50th time. “Sand is overrated,” Jim Carrey says. Same with sex-dating—overhyped, gritty, leaves you itchy.

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How I accomplished the feat of dating two best friends at the same time, took both their virginities and had a threesome.

Now, here’s the deal… downtown, the vibe is electric. Little cafés spill out onto tear-drop shaped plazas and art murals on Calle Milagro, right next to Parque Viento. The park – oh man – it’s a breathin’ haven for the lovelorn hearts and the dreamers. I’d often take my phone and code there, inspirin’ my next killer app feature, while watchin’ folks meet up and share smiles and secret glances.

Declassifying the Top-Secret Cast of ‘The Recruit’