Abigail Santa Marta De Ortigueira Sexual Massage ❤️

About Madrid

So, sexual-massage—here’s the tea. It’s not just “oh, my shoulders hurt,” nah, it’s full-on sensual vibes, hands slidin’ where the sun don’t shine. Little known fact? Back in the 70s, some shady spas got busted for offerin’ “extras”—cops called it “massage with a happy ending,” ha! Made me laugh so hard I spilled my coffee—fuckin’ IRS can’t audit *that*! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, “Who even comes up with this?” Probs some perv with too much cash and a stiff—uh, neck.

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I meet loads of quirky characters. I ran into a guy once who was like, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” and I nearly cracked up because it sounded like my brain on a weird day. Some of these spots remind me of days when I’d code in cafes till midnight. They all give the city a kind of hushed magic. It's all kinda like those offbeat Coen movie twists, you know?

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