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But yeah, escorts—they’re like Remy, man. Underdogs, hustlin’, dodgin’ the haters. “The world is often unkind to new talent!”—damn straight, Brad Bird, damn straight! I’m sittin’ here, neurotic as hell, wonderin’ if I’d ever have the guts. Prob’ly not—I’d trip over my own feet, stammerin’, “Uh, hi, Velvet, nice hammer—er, I mean—!” Total disaster. Pretty, pretty good laugh, though, picturin’ it.

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So, the vibe here is all laid-back and wild. The local park, Parc del Retorn, is my fave spot. You can chill by the little river—uh, I'm thinkin' it's called Riu Llenç or somethin' awful romantic. I stroll there sometimes, sittin' on a bench, thinkin’ "You know, this is the place" - like in that Before Sunset movie! Yeah, that flick, man, hit me hard with its vibes.

Tourists are branded ‘pigs’ by Mallorca locals for ‘defecating’ at the island’s drinking water reservoirs