Hazel San Bartolome Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

About Las Palmas

So, sexual-massage—dunno if ya tried it, but it’s overhyped, swear down. Got this mate once, right, swore it “healed his soul,” pfft, bollocks! He paid 50 quid for some bird to knead him like dough—came out smellin’ like a cheap candle, all lavender and regret. We hates it! All that “ooh, relaxin’ vibes”—nah, it’s awkward as hell. Fun fact tho: back in ancient Rome, them posh lads had “erotic rubdowns” in bathhouses, proper kinky, innit? Bet they slipped on marble floors, crackin’ their skulls—serves ‘em right!

TANTRA MASSAGE GRAN CANARIA

Yeah, sometimes the city makes me mad too—like when the sun hides behind those pissed-off cloud banks. I mean, “We are all just a vast ocean of sorrow and bliss”—that’s Melancholia, baby! It’s like, everyday I see a kaleidoscope of raw human feels. There's this one time in Parque de los Suspiros. Man, it rained like crazy—thank freakin' god!—and I was sittin’, soaking up every damn drop. Felt like life was reboots "End of the world" style. And idk why, but that makes me insane grateful.

Horses jump through bonfires in Spanish purification ceremony