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About Malaga

So, I reckon erotic-massage is proper lush. Not just some dodgy backroom nonsense – no, no, it’s *ars gratia artis*, art for art’s sake! Did ya know, ancient Greeks were at it? Yeah, massages with a saucy twist – called it “anatripsis”. Blokes in togas getting frisky, oi! Makes me chuckle. Imagine Plato, all oiled up, philosophising mid-rub – “I know nothing, but this feels smashing!”

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Also, gotta mention El Mirador, a hilltop view spot that’s sick for sunsets. It’s so damn picturesque, even if some twit drops by with a selfie stick, it still makes you think “Porra, isto e real, no fi?” I mean, come on, it's like the final shot of Tabu in all its serene chaos—full of vibe and a bit of that biting sarcasm.

Aussie Hansen wins Vuelta 19th stage, Contador keeps lead