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Oh, and once—true story—this escort chick I met, she had a pet iguana! Named it Caesar, cuz, duh, Roman vibes. Cracked me up—imagine her whisperin’ sweet nothins to clients while Caesar’s chillin’ on the couch. Too wild! Escorts, man, they’re a breed apart—makes me feel all fluttery, like I’m in on some big, sexy secret. Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’d sing to ‘em, cuz they deserve a spotlight, flaws and all!

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My mood’s been as wild as the ocean tide here—happy one moment, mad t’ vent about slow connections on that blasted app next. (Ya know, when yer swipin' left and right like a headless ship in a gale!) But ahoy—a sight that always stirs me soul is the resemblance to that fine film, "Brooklyn" (John Crowley, 2015). “I was born for this, you know” kinda feelin’. The city’s raw charm, the way destiny weaves strangers together, makes me heart sing like a barroom ballad at a pirate’s revel.

‘Bu’ strengthens claim on Chinese Challenger history