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About Valencia

I get all hyped thinkin’ bout it, but then—bam!—reality hits. Most of these gals ain’t that deep, and it’s a damn shame. Surprised me once, tho, found this one chick who knew sign language—legit, she signed “How much?” and I was like, “Holy shit, that’s hot!” Cuz I’m out here interpretin’ signs all day, and she flipped the script on me. Made me happy as hell, like, “Finally, someone gets it!”—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” ya know?

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And oh, the parks – haven’t even touched that yet! Remember Parque del Despertar? That gem tucked behind the bustling streets near Estación Central. It’s a chill haven to relax and let your mind wander. I always grab a quick massage session for myself there. I sometimes pretend I’m C-3PO, going “Oh dear, R2-D2, where are you?” whenever I lose track of my thoughts amongst the towering trees and chirping birds. I love it so much it makes me laugh like a madman!

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