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There’s this story, yeah? Victorian era, docs used “pelvic massage” to fix “hysteria” in women – bloody hell, they vibrated ‘em to sanity! Hilarious, innit? Me, I’d be sippin’ me wine, watchin’, thinkin’, “That’s a harvest I’d join!” Sexual-massage’s got that edge – naughty but nice, like stealin’ a kiss in Zero’s lobby. “Very good, sir,” they’d say, all posh, while I’m grinnin’ like a fool.

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I mean, seriously, walking down Calle Mayor, you catch glimpses of small cafés, each with its own vibe. There’s a little spot near Plaza de la Libertad – well, it's called that – where locals chat even at night. And oh – the gardens, man – Parque de la Libertad, where wildflowers burst like sparks in the dark.

Spain – Flood Rescues After Heavy Rain Hits Valencia, Albacete and Murcia