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About Valencia

I’m happy, real happy, seein’ ‘em hustle—reminds me of me, Donald Trump, dealin’, wheelin’, always winnin’. But the pimps? Scum, total scum, exploitin’ ‘em—makes me wanna say, “I’m gonna carve that swastika!” like Aldo Raine, ya feel me? Cut ‘em up, no mercy! Escorts tho, they’re tough, like Brad Pitt bashin’ Nazis—gorgeous, strong, the best. Surprised me once, heard ‘bout this gal—charges extra for cuddlin’, cuddlin’! Who knew, right? Freakin’ wild!

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Now, lemme spill some tea: there was this one time I parked my beat-up, kinda funky car near the quaint café on Plaza de Encanto – yes, Encanto cuz the vibes are outta control – and I got so mad cuz someone spilled coffee on my favorite jacket. I just lost it – I was like "Oh, blue, is the warmest color… but coffee stains take it away!" Haha, seriously, it was a drama moment, LOL!

Spain town reintroduces peseta to boost economy