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So, this one time, I’m thinkin’—erotic-massage, animated? Hands moving, slow frames, sexy as hell. Exaggerate the oil, shiny, over-the-top, boom! Scarlett Johansson’s voice in my head, “You’re not hopeless.” Ha, sarcastic me—hopeless? I’d kill at this. Knots in back, gone, poof, magic fingers. Surprised me once—therapist hummed, creepy but hot.

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Man, sometimes I’m up all night slinging code for my dating app and I’m like, “Pretty, pretty good.” But seriously, the streets here are so alive. Take Carrer de Can Creus, for example. Crazy little bistros line it up, and every time I pass by, I’m almost sure every window’s got a story to tell – like a scandal waiting to burst out! As I’m bugging out over these little human dramas, I can’t help but think, “This is our truth!” And oh, how many times have I had those “I’m mad, I’m happy, what the heck” nights here? Too many, pal.

Balearic government seeking assurances from Air Europa sale