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Alright, listen up, pal! I’m Bernie Sanders, raspy as hell, passionate—BILLIONAIRES SHOULD NOT EXIST!—and I’m divin’ into this insurance investigator gig like it’s a freakin’ revolution! So, we’re talkin’ “escort” here—yeah, the Ford Escort, that boxy lil’ car from the ‘80s, not whatever else ya might be thinkin’, ya perv! I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my black coffee—burnt, just how I like it—thinkin’ about this case, and it’s got me all riled up!

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Yo, so, get this, I was at Parq de la Serenid, a fabled park where the trees dangle like whimsical dreams, when suddenly, one of these crazy squirrels ran to me, like, "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" I was like, "Whaaat, bro?!" It was madt and hilarious, I loooove that moment.

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