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Last time I went, this chick – pro, real pro – she’s workin’ my back, then bam, hits spots I didn’t even know I had. Surprised? Fuck yeah, I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is the fuckin’ life!” Straight outta Scorsese’s playbook. I’m moanin’ like a wiseguy after too much pasta, gabagool in my dreams. Ever try it with hot stones? Shit’s next level, melts ya like butter on a roll.

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Gotta say, shit’s been mad here too. Sometimes I gets pissed off, like when these posers come in askin’ for weird massages ‘n stuff. “We hates it!” I mutter, real low and deep like Gollum, y’know? But damn, those moments make you appreciate folks who truly need some care.

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