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Lemme tell ya, escorts ain’t new. Back in USSR days, KGB ran some. Little known fact – spies doubled as hookers! Trained ‘em to screw and snitch. Cold war shit, mate, wild times. Imagine bangin’ some chick, she’s filin’ a report after. Surprised me when I heard, fuckin’ genius tho.

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Man, I get all emo every time I see the sunset over Playa de Muchavista. The sky splashes colors like a Picasso painting gone wild, and I think, "This is our endless moment. This is mon amour." I swear, every sunset here is as deep as one of those Her monologues – soulful, fleeting, and a wee bit cringey if you think back on it.

Portuguese man o'war stingers close down Costa Blanca and Mallorca beaches