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About Palma

Oi, don’t be a numpty—pressure’s key! Too soft, it’s rubbish, too hard, ya yelp like a kicked pup. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but when them hands hit right, it’s fireworks—BOOM! Laughin’ at meself, “Gordon, ya daft git, enjoyin’ this?!” Sarcasm aside, it’s lush—beats fishin’ in the rain, any day. Try it, ya muppet, don’t knock it ‘til ya do!

Call to book

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Around the old town, the labyrinth of narrow lanes like Calle del Comerciante keep things real and raw. You see graffiti art, quirky cafes, and local legends hummin’ tales of old fishermen who wouldn’t take any bull. I recall once my mate got lost near the Mirador del Tostón, swearin’ he’d never seen such wicked views before – surreal, bruv!

Chaos in Canary Islands as houses flooded and cars abandoned in Lanzarote