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About Las Palmas

What pisses me off? The lies! “I’m 6 foot”—bollocks, you’re 5’2” in lifts! “Love deep chats”—you mean deep throating a burger? Cackling here, cos it’s tragic. Happiest moment? Ghosting a prat who sent 12 dick pics—unasked! Surprised me how many still think that works. Wankers. Oh, and the apps rig it—keep ya single, milk ya wallet. Sneaky bastards.

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Look, this town has quirky corners and secret memories. I remember my first visit to the local park, Parque de los Ecos, where every echo felt like a cosmic whisper from ancient times. I was like "Wow, life is inexplicable, and so is that park!" It was such a mindblowing moment that my brain misfired like an old calculator (so many typos: misfired, msyed, mistir, misfed, mirored, mirred, misread, canht, nte, cunfused, lvoe, truely, rad, monment, and cosmicc!).

10 public transportation trips from Madrid