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So yeah, it’s wild, it’s messy—kinda fun, kinda awful. I’m rantin’, I’m ravin’—can’t stop! Next time you swipe, think of me—Larry, yellin’ at the screen, “This ain’t no way to live!” Sex-dating—it’s *Children of Men* with lube. Good luck out there, ya animals!
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I gets mad occasionally, ya know? Like that time when a pompous fella tried ta order me around at La Ronda Street. I nearly drew me cutlass! But hey, it's all parta the thrill, aye? Thrills and spilled rum, just like in our fav movie. I do fancy tossing in phrases like “keep your hands off my rum” in homage to that Wes Anderson flicky vibe, savvy?
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