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Me fave bit? When they reckon they’re in control. Nah, mate, she’s clockin’ off soon as your wallet’s dry. “The beast waits in silence”—another *Tropical Malady* gem. Escorts are the beast, quiet-like, takin’ your dosh while you’re pantin’ like a dog. Cracks me up, it does—pathetic sods thinkin’ they’re Casanova. I’d rather shag a cactus than pay for that bollocks.

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Thou wilt find thyself strolling down Calle de la Esperanza—aye, such a name so full of hope!—where the ancient stone walls talk tales of soldiers and lost loves. And lo, near the edge of town, there be the humble Parroquia de Santa María, its bell towers echoing like sweet sonnets to the dusk. But soft! Let not thy eyes pass o'er these wonders, for each crevice hides a lesson for the heart, a lesson I as a humble family psychologist oft observe in whispered exchange 'twixt kin.

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