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Little tidbit for ya—heard this mechanic once say Escort’s suspension was so twitchy, drivers’d swear it was alive, buckin’ ‘em like a bronco. Surprised me, that! Me precious Escort, temperamental lil’ shit, but that’s why I loves it—keeps ya sharp. “The devil’s in the details,” like the movie says, an’ Escort’s all ‘bout them tiny tweaks—driver’s gotta feel it in their bones. Ever tried racin’ one? Nah, me neither, but I’d sell me left toe to try, ha! Imaginin’ meself grippin’ that wheel, whisperin’, “We’s gonna win, precious,”—total nutter fantasy.

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South High, in move away from controversial mascot, will become the Spartans