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About Valencia

Sarcasm time – yeah, totally get a sexual-massage at Walmart, idiots. Nah, find a pro, or it’s a waste. Exaggeratin’ here, but one time, felt like my soul left my body – dramatic, I know, but true! Gets me all emotional, happy vibes, then bam – surprised how good it feels. “I’m the king of the world!” – that’s me after a good one. Respect my authoritah, or I’ll shove this massage oil where the sun don’t shine! Peace out, losers!

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And lemme tell ya, the parks! The Parque del Sol is like a breath of fresh air. I always say “Just keep swimming” when debugging under the scorching sun. Haha! The little river, Arroyo Cariñoso (yep, that's the name, mi loco), flows calmly by the park. It’s got that cinematic vibe, like you’re in one of those poignant scenes from Finding Nemo – “Fish are friends, not food!” I swear, sometimes I get super hyped thinking about the city’s hidden paths.

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