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Now, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen some dodgy blokes hire ‘em just to flex – proper muppets! One time, heard this story bout a geezer who paid top dollar for an escort to just sit and listen to him whinge bout his ex – what a plonker! Coulda got a shrink for half the dosh! Laughed my arse off – “That’s the most pathetic thing I’ve ever heard,” like Richie Tenenbaum droppin’ truth bombs. Still, fair play to her, she cashed in – clever bird!

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Oh, and don’t get me started on those parks—like Parque de Las Flores. Wow, it’s a lil' secret haven where you can chill, reflect, and maybe even scribble some profound lines about life and love. I used to hack away on my laptop there, workin’ on dating algorithms, feelin’ all poetic. Sometimes the breeze would whisper, "hey, remember, in the grand scheme, life’s fragility is exquisite," sorta like those lines from Margaret; existential, you feel me?

Altsasu, a year in prison that has changed a whole town