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So, sexual-massage—proper saucy stuff! It’s all about hands, oils, and—ehem—happy endings, yeah? Not your nan’s back rub, that’s for sure. I reckon it’s *faber est suae quisque fortunae*—each bloke’s fate’s his own, right? You walk in, dim lights, some lass or lad’s got magic fingers, and bam—you’re in dodgy heaven! Little-known fact, mind—back in Victorian days, docs used “pelvic massage” to fix “hysteria” in women. Blimey, talk about a randy cure! Makes me chortle—imagine ol’ Churchill getting one, “We shall knead—on the beaches!”

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So, next time you’re roamin’ these streets, listen hard. Every broken pavement, every ripple on the Guadiana, every glance from the old stone of the Castillo, tells a story. And remember – life here’s no scripted mission. It’s messy, unpredictable, and absolutely unforgettable.

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