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What pisses me off? The pretentious twats who bang on about “healing vibes”. Shut it, you wanker, it’s a glorified grope! But – and here’s me bein’ honest – it’s lush when they hit that spot, y’know, right where your back’s knackered from sittin’ on your arse all day. Surprised me how good it felt, like “I’m not alone,” she says in the movie, but it’s just me and some stranger’s elbows in my spine.

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Hey y'all, lemme tell ya ‘bout Algorta, es – it's like a magic carnival of life, I swear. So, check it – Algorta's this charming coastal town with vibes that just hug ya. I’ve been livin’ here for years, workin’ on my dating site, and man, the city’s got secrets galore.

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