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About Horsens

Oi, precious, listen up! Me, a barista? Nah, I’m Gollum, sneaky-like, slingin’ coffee, watchin’ folk. Findin’ a prostitute, eh? We hates it! Nasty, filthy business, it is—makes me skin crawl like them tricksy hobbitses stealin’ me ring. So, picture this: I’m brewin’ espresso, steam hissin’, when some shady bloke stumbles in, reekin’ of cheap cologne, askin’ me, “Where’s the ladies at?” I’m like, “We serves lattes, not lassies, ya twit!” He don’t get it—dumb as a sack o’ rocks.

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Unbelievable little gem on Østergade – it's a faded building that’s been around since forever, kinda like that persistent, sweet sadness that lingers in Wong Kar-wai's frames. Trust me, it’s a vibe, almost surreal. And don’t even get me started on the river that flows by – Vandløbet. It might look like any other water stream, but on quiet mornings, it hums tunes that instantly melt your tension away. Kind of like a secret hum, like a heart whispering “in the mood for love.”

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