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Oh, and—random thought—imagine Riley from the movie gettin’ one at 18? Ha! “Fear” would freak, “Disgust” would puke—hilarious! Anyway, sexual-massage rocks if ya find the real deal. Blows yer mind, swear! What ya think, pal?

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Now, as a women's counselor – yes, me self – I’ve come to notice the finer, often overlooked details. There's this teeny park, Ravnehaven, where you can sit and chat with strangers turning into friends – it's posset and solace, I say! You know the idea: "in the mood for love"? Yeah, that movie that sets your heart racing in a dreamy haze. It’s just like walking through the park on a dewy morning in Horning, a feeling so nostalgia-soaked you almost hear kkkk... the echoes of bygone romances in the wind, if you catch my drift.

Meet Libertarian senate candidate Andy Horning