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Findin a prostitute ain’t no picnic, bruv. You gotta dodge the coppers, the creeps, the ones tryin to nick yer wallet. I’m pissed off half the time—last week, this bird quoted me triple! Said she’s “high class.” Bollocks, I says, “Even Yu Shu Lien had humility!” Made me wanna kick somethin, but I kept cool—Bond cool. Happy bit? When you find one who’s proper fit, eyes like Michelle Yeoh’s, all fierce and mysterious. Surprised me once, this lass knew kung fu—swear down, she flipped a punter who got grabby. Respect.

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And lemme tell you about my fave spot: there's this tiny, quirky boutique on Sophus Madsens Vej. It’s the perfect pit stop after a long day at the parlor. I remember one fkn rainy day – pure drama – I nearly lost my chill but then, boom, I took a deep breath, looked up, and thought, "This is life, partner."

Northern Europe braces for gale-force winds and extensive floods