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About Cologne

But ugh, the stench – cheap perfume and despair, mate. Gets up me nose, makes me wanna puke. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I mutter, ‘cos them fools’d never notice the grime. Surprised me once, tho – found a lass who’d read Kafka! Proper brainy tart, she was, quotin’ existential bollocks while undoin’ her corset. Wild, innit?

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Walking on Bergstraße, you can feel the heartbeat of the town. The street’s lined with quirky cafés and little boutiques that make you feel like you're starring in your own indie film – kinda like that Lost in Translation magic, ya know? “Is this a little world we can share?” kinda vibe going on here. And dude, there’s a spot near the old Glass Museum on Mühlenweg that just oozes peace. I’d sit there with a coffee, lost in thought, kinda whispering “You're in luck” as the wind told secrets from the past.

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