Claire Schwedt (oder) Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Hamburg

Now, I ain’t gonna lie, sometimes it pisses me off. You got folks out here chargin’ an arm and a leg—$200 for an hour? Are ya kiddin’ me? I’m over here like, “That’s my grocery money, ya greedy buzzard!” But when it’s good, oh man, it’s *good*. Like when Frank in the movie says, “I just want to feel alive”—that’s the vibe, y’all. Them fingers diggin’ in, findin’ spots you didn’t even know was screamin’—it’s a dang revelation!

There ya go, mate – a mad, rambling, heartfelt glimpse of a city that’s as unpredictable as my love for erratic typos (sorry, my brain juices run like mad – typos: wrogn, happny, and so, awesome, cool, rad, buzzig, awesum, rocked, twsted, lve, mxd, real, thet, buzz, crzy, off, and mate!). Now, off with ye – explore, embrace, and let Schwedt show ya its magic!

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