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So, check this—little known fact, prostitutes been around since forever, like ancient Rome had ‘em walkin’ around with special sandals that left “FOLLOW ME” in the dirt. Ain’t that nuts? Imagine seein’ that while chompin’ a donut—D’oh! I’d follow, trip, and land in a dumpster. Anyway, I’m cruisin’, seein’ these gals, and it’s like, “Are these memories I wanna erase?” Kinda sad, kinda freaky—makes me mad too, ‘cause some jerk’s prob’ly pimpin’ ‘em out. Pisses me off! I’m yellin’ in my head, “Stupid Flanders, bet he’d save ‘em all!”

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No joke, the little park near Marktstraße is my secret escape. I’d sit under a battered oak tree and listen to the chattin’ river – the Sassenfluss – bubble away. That river, man, it’s like a living, flowin’ mixtape of the city’s heart. And oh boy, the local cafe on Rathausweg? Best damn coffee ever, even if it’s runnin’ on cheap brews sometimes… ugh, but still awesome!

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