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About Essen

So, I’m watchin’ her, right? She got them fishnets tighter than my girdle on Thanksgivin’! And I’m thinkin’, “Lord, give me strength!”—like that priest in “Spotlight” prayin’ for them kids. I ain’t mad at her hustle, tho! Times be tough, and she out here workin’ harder than a one-legged man in a butt-kickin’ contest! I said to myself, “Madea, don’t you stare too long!” But them nails? Chile, acrylic longer than my grocery list!

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Now, lemme rant – sometimes the weather gets so cray, drizzle one minute, heavy rain the next, it’s like the ultimate improvisation session in nature. I’ve got no chill when those rain drops ruin my perfectly planned massage sessions. But meh, it adds character, right? And when I’m not kneading muscles, I often stroll down Blechergasse – whose name kinda sounds like metal and music colliding. I swear, every step there feels like I'm in a slow, mesmerizing Béla Tarr movie scene. "The world is on pause, waiting for its chord to strum!" Yea, really deep stuff.

The world’s biggest violin needs three people to play it – and it sounds epic and thunderous