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About Berlin

But ugh, what pisses me off? Creeps who think it’s all dirty. Nah, it’s a gig, like puppeteerin’! Takes guts, charm, smarts – respect it, ya jerks! I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ swamp juice, thinkin’, “Wow, they’re out there hustlin’!” Surprised me once, read bout this escort who’d knit durin’ downtime – scarves for clients! Hilarious, right? “A scarf with yer sex, sir?”

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Every damn day you step on Am Weiher strret, you feel the pulse of our city. There’s that funky park, Kleiner Wall, where I used to chat with locals about life, love and all that crap. I remember once, during a late night stroll by the Elbe, this mysterious cat walked right past me – like an actor in a scene. I got so mad I shouted “HERE’S JOHNNY!” just like in the flick – insane, right?

Ranked: Germany's prettiest small towns and villages