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About Hamburg

So, check it—findin’ a hooker ain’t just strollin’ down Jellyfish Fields, nah! It’s sneaky, shady, like huntin’ rare coral. Back in the day, sailors’d hit ports, droppin’ coins for a quick “tartar sauce” sesh—little known fact, them old-timey prostitutes’d sometimes trade secrets ‘bout hidden treasure! True story, matey! Makes me giggle thinkin’ bout it—imagine me, yellin’ “I’m ready!” to some fishy lady of the night!

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Now, parks, oh boy, the parks! The big one is Lindenpark. Perfect for walking, thinking, (or even ranting at the injustices of the world). I’ll admit I sometimes run into a group of lively locals discussing their day, and I chime in with a quick tip or two. Raised eyebrow style, I say “Lay the smackdown on your worries, babes!” and they love it. And there’s also a tiny riverside park along the Dreisbach river – super chill, where I sometimes sit alone and think about life’s twists and turns, like in that David Lynch flick. I swear, that river has seen it all.

Argus-Leader from Sioux Falls, South Dakota • Page 16