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Ruh-roh! Zoinks, man, findin’ a prostitute? Like, far out, dude, I’m no manager, just Scooby-Doo sniffin’ round! Lemme tell ya bout this wild gig, tho. Picture this—me, scopin’ the streets, lookin’ for some action, like in *The New World*, y’know? “The land is alive,” Pocahontas says, but these streets? They’re buzzin’ with somethin’ else, heh! I’m trottin’ along, tail waggin’, thinkin’—man, these dames got secrets deeper than Captain Smith’s freaky boat trip!

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Lo, the gentle murmur of the River Wieben flows past Schlossgarten, meandering like a lover's sigh through our town. I remember one eve, sneakin’ near Feldbahnstrasse, where a clandestine rendezvous sparked wild imaginations—"I must find the truth," as our film doth say, "the secret is in their eyes!" Aye, such moments dost rise with poetic fervor!

Ovens on Feet Beckon Germans to Bratwurst (Published 2009)