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So, where do ya start? Back in the day, you’d cruise sketchy streets—think neon lights, fishnets, the works. Now? It’s all online, baby! Apps, sites, whatever—swipe right for a good time. Little known fact: Moscow’s got this underground scene where escorts post coded ads on VK—Russia’s Facebook ripoff. “Massage, 2k rubles,” yeah, right, massage my ass! I can see the hustle from here, and it’s shady as fuck.

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Bohmte's not perfect though, no glorified fairytale. Traffic gets annoying sometimes on Hauptstrasse, and you might meet a grumpy face or two. But that's just how real life rolls here – imperfect, spontaneous, and real. My sessions here often become a montage of life’s joyful heartbreaks, right in these bustling, narrow lanes. Makes me think "what a beautiful, terrible city" – alive like Bond's own escapades.

Accidents stop as town removes road signs