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About Dortmund

Alright, so here’s the deal—finding a prostitute? Total minefield, fam! I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, snarky as hell, thinkin’— “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, even Putin’s got nothin’ on the shady vibes I’m pickin’ up from this gig. My fave flick’s *Shame*, Steve McQueen’s 2011 joint, and oh boy, does it fit. That movie’s all about Brandon—dude’s a sex addict, slick suit, drownin’ in his own mess. “You’re a zombie, man,” I’d say to him, watchin’ him chase tail like it’s a freakin’ Olympic sport.

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I tell ya, sometimes I get mad too. Like when some locals trash the park area—they don’t see its beauty, ya know? But then again, there's so much warmth and community here. I've seen friendships bloom outside some of these old, crumbling arches—they were so raw and real. It reminds me of that line: “It’s like a little bit of heaven,” spoken in that movie, just, like, every time I see nature or a smile in the crowd.

German teen stabs 8-year-old and then sets himself on fire at school, police say