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Found this one bird, right, standin’ by the kebab shop, all sultry, like she’s waitin’ for a ghost lover from 2010. “You see me in the shadow?” she says, channin’ Boonmee vibes, and I’m like, “Bruv, I see ya, and I’m hyped!” She’s got them eyes, deep like the Thai forest, and I’m thinkin’, “This is peng!” Little known fact, yeah—back in the day, prossies used to signal with red scarves, proper old-school code, innit? Made me happy, like, “History’s alive, fam!”

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Now, don't get me started on the little quirks of Bayreuth. One time, while I was in a quaint antique shop off Margraveplatz, I found an old book on sex positions that sparked a wild debate with the shopkeeper. I nearly fainted – not that it was odd, but who keeps books like that? And then there are corners – like near the city park Schwanenteich – so secret and tucked away that they give you a wink: "Hey, come have a laugh and love a bit, 'cause life's a carnival, y'all!"

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