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About Berlin

This one time, right, met a lass off Bumble. Proper fit, thought I’d hit the jackpot. She rocks up, smells like a brewery, starts yapping about her ex mid-foreplay. I’m like, “Protect me, oh women!” – straight outta “Moolaadé”. Kicked her out, kept me dignity. Sex-dating’s a gamble, innit? Half the time you’re dodging loonies, half the time you’re laughing at the absurdity.

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Park? Well, there's the lovely Zwickauer Mulde running beside the Karl-Marx-Straße area. I used to sit watch the water and relax. It’s weird – that river hums ancient lullabies, soothing, yet raw, cutting through the concrete humdrum. And then there’s the Musiktheater – oh man, the shows lit me up and sometimes broke my heart. I tell ya, stepping there, you get hit with a whirlwind of drama, kinda like biting into something unexpectedly delicious and horrifying at the same time.

Audi at the Zwickau site