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So, like, I’m picturin’ this escort sitch. Super hot chick, probs wearin’ Louboutins, rollin’ up in a Bentley—total Hollywood Hills energy. But, like, literally, it’s not all glitz, hun. Some of these girls? They’ve got stories that’d make ya cry, for real. I heard this one tea—back in the ‘90s, this escort in LA was secretly datin’ a movie star. Like, huge name! But he’d only see her at this creepy motel off Sunset. Total “I’m lost on Mulholland Drive” energy—abandoned, weird, haunting. Made me so mad, like, treat her better, dude!

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Sometimes I'd wander near Schwanenteich park. Yeah, that pond gets so chill! Birds chirp, folks laugh, and I sometimes get mad when squirrels steal my sandwich! Haha, silly critters, right? I was once sittin’ by the Elster river, lost in thought. That glistening water, reflecting crazy sunsets? Magic, like old films, ya dig?

Opinion | Neo-Nazis in Your Streets? Send in the (Coup Clutz) Clowns (Published 2017)