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About Munich

But lemme tell ya, some of these profiles? “I love hikes and wine”—bullshit! They’re bangin’ in a Motel 6 by Tuesday! Reminds me of that line, “You sold me!”—like, who’s foolin’ who here? I tried it once—met this broad, Lisa. Hot, but clingy as fuck. Two dates in, she’s textin’ “Where you at, Tone?” I’m like, “I ain’t your slave, lady!” Dumped her faster than Paulie whacks a snitch.

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I live near Wittenauer Straße – yes, that one – right behind the quaint café on the corner that serves the best flat white ever. Man, those cracked pavements tell stories. I used to stroll there, deep into the night, thinking – “I’m not afraid of dying, just bored of living” – right outta The Royal Tenenbaums style, ya know?

Two police officers injured in Berlin explosion near police station