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So, check it—little-known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got these sensual rubdowns to “balance their chi.” Freaky, huh? Bet they didn’t tell ya that in history class! Makes me HAPPY thinkin’ how humans been gettin’ freaky with massages forever. But yo, what pisses me off? People judgin’ it—like, “Oh, it’s shady!” Nah, fam, it’s art! It’s connection! “Unleash the power within!”—it’s YOU tappin’ into your own fire, ya feel me?

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So, listen up! I be livin’ in this wacky gem for many a year, near old Marktstraße, where cobbles and alleys whisper secrets. O, how the narrow lanes, like Schillerweg, doth wind and twist—so much like mine own thoughts on a sleepless night, I swear! Ye canst stroll past the ancient fountain by Wurstplatz and let river Füll be thy guide. Sometimes I think, “By the gods, this is divine, like the souls in Joshua’s film—raw, unbridled, brutal yet beautiful!”