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Oh, and the typos—sue me, I’m typin’ fast. Escrot. Escprt. Whatever. Point is, it’s a hustle. Some love it, some hate it, most just payin’ bills. Surprised me once—read this escort’s blog, all witty and raw. Expected smut, got poetry. Blew my damn mind. “I think I’m in love with you,” I’d say, if I were Eli Cash, all dramatic and dumb.

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Ohhh, mate, Wegberg is, err, a wild little gem, y'know? It's like, um, I stroll down Am Bahnhofstrasse—yes, that street's a riot with quirky shops—and then you get to the little park near St. Lambertus Church, eh? I mean, it's sooo pretty and, um, kinda serene, like in that movie, In the Mood for Love… "mmmm, such tenderness," y'know?

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