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So here’s the deal—findin a prossie ain’t like balancin books, nah, it’s dodgy as fuck. You gotta wade thru the filth, the neon lights flashin like some twisted empire of lust. We shall fight the pimps, we shall fight the coppers, we shall fight the bleedin STDs creepin up yer trousers! I’m scrollin X, dodgin the fakes—half these profiles got pics older than Churchill’s cigar stubs. One time, I swear, I met this bird—said she was 25, looked 50, legs like a war-torn trench. Made me mad as a hatter—wasted me quid on that!

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Takin’ a spin through the lesser-known Wohnviertel Ost is a must. There, narrow lanes like Lindenweg crisscross with colourful street art – man, it’s a creative explosion! I once played therapist with some local artists. They spilled their souls right there! And on a breezy day at the small park ambling near Blumenstraße – y'know, the one with that odd little sculpture? – I felt so many emotions. It was like every bench was a confessional, man!

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