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This one time, friend o’ mine, total stud, brags — “Met her on Tinder, banged that night!” Next day, he’s ghosted, cryin’ like a womp rat. Laughed I did, “Predictable, this trap is!” Sex-dating’s a gamble — hot one sec, cold as Hoth the next. Pisses me off, tho — fakes everywhere, catfishes posin’ with filters. “You are not a person,” I wanna scream, quotin’ Caden Cotard, “You’re a mask!” Drives me up the wall, it does.

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Stolberg is a mad mix of old charm and modern chaos. I stroll past the old Schloss Stolberg – yep, that medieval castle that makes ya feel all heroic, then bam, there's the Marktplatz, bustling like a mad carnival every bloody day. You walk down Petersstraße, then pop over to Vater-Rhein-Straße, where the vibes are a bit nostalgic, like a scene from "Brooklyn" – trust me, it's bloody brilliant!

Europa Nostra joins visit to Historic Centre of Stolberg in Germany, shortlisted for the 7 Most Endangered Programme 2022