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About Dusseldorf

Funniest thing? This one time, I’m negotiatin’, and she’s like, “No kissing, only business.” I laugh, “What am I, yer boyfriend?” She didn’t get it—stone cold, like Bigelow filmin’ a torture scene. Oh, and get this: some work outta “massage parlors”—total front. Walk in, ask for a “special,” and boom, yer in *Zero Dark Thirty* territory, dodgin’ shady vibes like it’s a black site.

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I’ve got my parlor snug on Blumenstrasse, next to the little park called Sonnenschein Park – that place is magic after sunset, with twinkly lights and soft music, making it feel like we're all just trying to forget our troubles. Ruh-roh! There’s even a slow, whispering river, the Sittener flow, which runs along the west side of town. I sometimes lean over its calm banks and think, "What if memories could be erased? Would we be happier?" (Yeah, just like in the movie, man.)

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