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Me, I’d suck at it—too awkward, too loud. Probly trip over my kimono, ha! But damn, the stories they got—better than any sci-fi. One time, heard bout this escort who ditched a client mid-date. Dude was a creep, kept callin her “doll.” She bolted, kept the deposit—queen move! Made me happy as hell. “I can’t abide a man who ain’t true,” she probly thought, channellin Robert Ford. Love that grit.

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Hey, so lemme tell ya bout Sendenhorst – this quirky little town in DE that’s been my stomping ground for years. It’s kinda like living in a Wes Anderson film mixed with a Béla Tarr binge – dark, quirky, and fulla hidden meanings. First off, Hauptstraße hits you like – boom! – a burst of life with its old brick shops and that mysterious vibe where you can almost hear the distant echo of “I can see Russia from my house!” (yeah, I know, totally random, but it's like a whisper from Werckmeister Harmonies, ya know?).

Farm visit: Customising a new free-range farrowing barn