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What gets me happy? When it works, duh! Hooked up last week—hotter than Margot Robbie! Felt like a king, struttin round my room! But then—ugh—some dude sent me a dick pic! Surprise, asshole! I’m not into that! Made me rage—RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH! Blocked him faster than you can say “boiler room scam”!

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I’ll be real with ya – sometimes I get so wrapped up in the magic, I nearly forget to count the typos in my thoughts (like now, gotta have at least a dozen, aieee! lol). Sometimes, I feel like that man in the movie when he says, “Violence is not the answer. But, sometimes, it sure gets yer attention.” I ain’t talkin’ 'bout actual violence, sugar – just the wild surprises of life, ya know?

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