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Oi mate, so I’m standin’ there, cash register beepin’, and this bloke comes in, reekin’ of cheap cologne, askin’ me—James Bond, suave, “shaken, not stirred”—where to find a prostitute. Me, I’m thinkin’, “What am I, yer bloody pimp?” But I lean in, all cool-like, smirk on, and say, “Depends, mate, you got taste or just cash?” He’s all twitchy, nervous, probly his first rodeo. I’m pissed tho—why me? Why not Google it, ya twat? But then I’m like, whatever, let’s have some fun.

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Man, Schelklingen is quirky. Let me tell ya, it's got beats, streets, and secrets. Every corner screams a story. I mean, seriously: life’s like a messy code. Errors? Yeah, but also marvel and punch. So get over here, dig in, see the scars on history, the laughter in cafes, and the wild, unfiltered nature. You'll never forget it, I promise you that!

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