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About Berlin

Oi mate, me, Mr. Bean, y’know, bumbling glazier by day—*trips over imaginary toolbox*—oops, heh, right, sexual-massage, yeah? So, I’m thinkin’, blimey, it’s all slippery hands, innit? Like, oof, rub-a-dub, bit o’ oil, *mimes slipping off chair*—whoopsie! Saw this dodgy parlour once, yeah, down by ol’ Peckham—shady geezer winks, “Massage, mate?” I’m like, *nervous giggle*, nah, ta, got windows to fix! But, cor, sexual-massage, it’s proper ancient, yeah? Romans did it, dirty sods—called it “frictio,” fancy that! Bet they’d slap oil on like, *slaps thigh, slips*—argh, steady on!

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I walk my way past the riverside park (yeah, that one with the silly ducks and a big ol’ cherry blossom tree) and think, "Wow, this city’s got soul." Sometimes I see couples on Benjaminsweg, laughin’ and kissin’ like there's no tomorrow. But the streets mix up—one minute you're on the artsy side near Kiefernweg, the next you're in the busy marketplace zone where vendors holler "Fresh bratwurst!" D’oh, it can get so hectic!