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Alright, listen up, my friend! I’m Gandalf, the freakin’ Watchman, and I’ve got thoughts—wild ones—about this sexual-massage biz. You shall not pass without hearin’ me out! Picture this: hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a hot day. It’s sneaky, sensual—like Amélie’s lil’ tricks in Paris, y’know? “In this world, anything’s possible!” she’d say, and damn right, a good rubdown proves it.

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Look, I ain’t some tourist guide – I live this stuff daily. I get stoked by the sight of kids playin' by the fountain at Kirchplatz (even if I roll my eyes at their loud laughter sometimes). Every corner’s got a story, even if it’s just the old ice cream truck that bumps out tunes.