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What pisses me off? The fakes! Liars sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re shorter than Yoda. Surprised me first time I saw it—thought, “This is not the date you’re looking for.” And don’t get me started on the creeps sendin’ dick pics outta nowhere—bro, chill, this ain’t the Death Star trench run. “Your lack of faith disturbs me,” I’d tell ‘em if I could. Sex-dating’s got rules, unspoken ones—don’t be a sleemo, ya know?

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The park, oh! Schöneweide Park, it's my go-to. I chill there sometimes, massagin' away my frustrations, bikes and noise all around. I love sittin' near the little pond. It’s chill, sorta like my life—smooth, interrupted by crazy moments of calm and storm. There’s that rustic gazebo too, where time seems frozen but then- bam!—life hits ya like a slap.

In Berlin, a Creative Paradise That’s Easiest to Reach by Boat (Published 2019)